Your leadership goes far beyond the work you and your team do. You and your team likely spend more time with one another than with anyone else. That time, those discussions, and those relationships add up. Moment by moment, with each decision and interaction, you build the future. Our future.
What are you building?
It should be clear to every leader at this point: there’s no getting back to “normal.” The pandemic has unalterably shifted the economic landscape and business operations. The racial equity movement sweeping the world underscores that “normal” wasn’t working. There’s no going back, but together, we can co-create a better future.
Whether you’re rebuilding to face new business realities or doing the hard work to create a more equitable world, you’re not going to do either one overnight. It takes time. The emotion of the moment gives way to the daily slog of showing up, doing the work, and making it happen.
If you aren’t aware of that shift in gears, it can sneak up on you and steal your motivation, cause depression, and stop the work before it starts.
Give yourself a few minutes each day to acknowledge the work ahead. That you’ve moved from a sprint where the world is flying by, to a steady jog that doesn’t have the same adrenalin but will chew up the miles if you maintain the pace.
Have you read the manual on how to lead your organization through a global pandemic, the greatest economic upheaval in one hundred years, and a global racial equity movement?
We haven’t seen that one either. These moments are filled with incredible opportunities to make a better future, but there’s no playbook. There are no easy answers.
There is only showing up every day, learning uncomfortable truths, acknowledging what’s not working, and working together to find a path forward.
Let’s be real: for most people, that’s painful or scary.
As you try new strategies to be more relevant and add value to your customers, some of them will work, some of them won’t.
If you’re white and actively listening to the experiences of people of color, it will be uncomfortable (it should be).
If you’re leading a team of people who are working remotely and balancing a sick parent, stir-crazy kids, and an out-of-work spouse and figuring out how to be compassionate and also move your business forward – it’s going to be uncomfortable.
It’s uncomfortable, but it’s okay. You don’t have to solve everything. Show up. Sit with the discomfort. Acknowledge it. Shake hands with it and welcome it on the journey to a better future. That discomfort is a sign that you’re heading in the right direction. Remember your past moments of courage and let them fuel your next steps.
As you and your team face uncertainty, you can regain clarity and focus by returning to your purpose and values. Why do you do the work you do? How have you committed to treating one another and serving your customers?
As you reconnect with your why and your values, you may see them in a new light. That commitment to your customer is still true; how can it guide you now?
You’ll restore your confidence and energy when you can say, “The world is changing, but this is who we are and this is why we’re here.”
We’ve been so inspired by the ways leaders across industries are working hard to connect with their people. Keep at it. Leading through uncertainty and change requires a tight connection with your team. It can feel challenging to stay connected in the press of so much activity, but it’s an investment that pays off with trust, results, and the ability to move quickly when you have to.
You will not build a better future on your own. You may have a vision, but you won’t have all the answers. The future is one we must build together. Whether you’re working on how to add value in new ways or trying to build a more just and equitable workplace, courageous questions will help you get there.
Courageous questions aren’t milquetoast “How can we get better?” efforts. They require confidence and humility. They acknowledge improvement is possible and get specific. They invite genuine answers that people might not otherwise be comfortable to volunteer. For example:
If you’ve done the work to get comfortable with discomfort, listening as people answer your courageous questions will test it. You may feel attacked. It’s okay—everything you’re hearing is feedback and data you can use to build a better future. Work on separating the message from the messenger or the way it was delivered.
Acknowledge what you’ve heard. Thank people for sharing—especially the hard truths. Then find the principles that will help you and your team move forward.
If you defensively want to ignore what you’ve heard because “they just don’t get it”—be careful. These moments represent a wide gulf between you and your people. You don’t understand one another and that lack of understanding quickly erodes trust. How can you rebuild it?
If they’re missing critical business data, give it to them and invite them back to the conversation. If you don’t understand where they’re coming from, do the work to get there.
“It’s just so much.”
We’ve heard this over and over as we talk with leaders—and it is. Our emotions don’t do well with huge orders of magnitude. But you can take all of that emotion and focus it. What is the M.I.T. that you can do today to build a better future for your business? What is the M.I.T. (Most Important Thing) you can do today to build a more equitable world?
No matter how big your vision, you can break it down into next steps. We invite you to find your focus with one business M.I.T. and one personal M.I.T.
It’s natural to look at massive upheaval and wonder “What’s next?” But there’s also a time to stop wondering and start building. Your team needs your leadership. You need the voice of every team member. And to build a better future, we need each other.
We’d love to hear from you. Leave us a comment and share how you’re shifting gears, connecting, listening, and building tomorrow, together.
They’re the phrases that should send a shiver up your spine if you want to lead for results. I’ve heard them from team members in every industry imaginable. You might recognize them:
Every time I hear one of these, I shudder.
These are the words whispered by the walking dead – maybe they haven’t left your team or company yet, but there’s no life left in them. They’re just shuffling through the day, going through the motions, like zombies.
If you have people in your team or organization talking this way, one of two things has happened:
1) You have discouraged your team by failing to lead.
2) You have a very negative team member who will be discouraging the rest of the team. (And they’re still there because you’ve failed to lead.)
Either way, it’s time for you to lead. Every person wandering around …
thinking that their effort makes no difference …
feeling that no one cares …
feeling frustrated and refusing to take responsibility …
Has quit.
They’re a walking tragedy of vital human life stunted and withering away. (Not to mention tons of lost productivity for the organization.)
If you want to lead for results, I applaud you. We desperately need good leaders.
But leadership means responsibility. If you have disheartened people on your team who have stopped trying, that’s on you. The reasons are usually straightforward:
These are a leader’s responsibilities. And if you’re leading, you’re responsible.
As every reader of Winning Well knows, you can treat people well and lead for results. They’re not mutually exclusive. In fact, they go together.
When people:
They own the outcomes, are energized, proactively solve problems, and personally invest in what they’re doing.
Which team member would you rather have?
Are you leading for results and relationships?
If not, I invite you to start small. Pick one area—perhaps encouragement—and honestly show appreciation. Or maybe start by removing a frustrating system that prevents people from doing their best work.
The point is, don’t change everything all at once. You can’t do it and you’ll frustrate yourself. Start small.
If you’re not sure where to start and you have any team members you can trust to give you honest feedback, ask them. Or do a DIY 360 evaluation and pick just one thing—the most frequently occurring item and address it.
People are remarkably graceful. When they see you work on being effective, your credibility soars.
Start by encouraging the people you see every day. Recognize others for what they’ve done. Begin talking about what your team might accomplish or where it could be. Look for problems you can solve.
Whatever your formal role, we need you to lead. We need people who dare to dream, who show us the way. We need people who will take risks to solve problems that others refuse to recognize even exist.
We need people who ask the right questions, who challenge our thinking. We need people who inspire us, who motivate us, and who encourage us.
We need leaders.
We need you.
Happy Halloween
Do you have a great idea burning inside you? Will it transform your company? In today’s episode, you’ll meet Jamie Marsden – an engineer who saw an opportunity and built a team to support leaders in a groundbreaking way. He’ll share his journey, inspiration to help you do the same, and some helpful thoughts on being a great manager and leader.
If you’ve got a leader you would like to nominate for a future episode profile in leadership excellence, please email me or head to the podcast homepage and click the orange button.
Leadership is the belief that together, we can have a better tomorrow. Are you in the hope business?
It’s a hard truth that confounds many leaders: continued success requires continued change.
But change isn’t easy. For most people (and therefore most of your team) it’s more comfortable to do what you did yesterday than to do something new today.
One of the critical roles every leader plays is to help their teams to navigate change successfully. Not just change for the sake of change, but strategic change that achieves breakthrough results.
Transforming results requires every heart and brain working together. Change requires confidence and inclusion, not selling. When you take your audacious vision and make it feel real, practical, and achievable, your team will be energized and ready for what’s next.
Be crystal clear about what you want to accomplish. Communicate and reinforce your vision through every medium possible. When you’re sure everyone’s got it, communicate even more. It’s important to explain the reasons behind a change as well as to identify the specific behaviors you need from employees in each role.
The notion that all that employees care about is WIIFM—what’s in it for me?—is BS. Sure, employees want to know what’s in it for them. They equally want to know what’s in it for you and for their customers.
It’s not enough to be clear about the “What?” – they’ve got to know the “Why?” as well. In the absence of information, people often jump to the most pathological conclusion. Leave out key information and they fill in the blanks with assumptions (e.g., “the next thing you’ll do is downsize.”) They want to know that you’ve thought this through with your brain and not just your pocketbook.
Don’t advocate for an idea or change that’s half-baked or full of flaws. Test it first with a small group, take their feedback seriously, and get it right. It’s tough to regain credibility. “Oh yeah, I admit it stank before, but now it’s better,” only leaves people wondering why some bozo made a choice to sing praises for an idea, system, or process that was full of problems in the real world.
Even if it looks great on paper, your boss is sold, and it worked well in the IT war room, field test the change first.
Yes, this takes time. Go slow to go fast.
Take the risk of making some waves to make it easy for your team. You might be slower out of the gate than others, but when you get it right and everyone owns it, you’ll sustain your results and be ready for the next change.
This is perhaps the most important part. Really listen to what your people tell you. Respond to feedback with solutions, not selling. When you fix something, communicate it back using the 5×5 method – 5 times, 5 different ways. Ask, “How can we address this and make the change serve its purpose?”
Share as many testimonials as you can, especially from people who were doubtful at first. Get your most excited employees showing how your new idea, system, or process changed their world. Your most influential stories will come from the least likely suspects: the sales guy who never bothered with this stuff before, the new rep who’s now running circles around the old-timers because she uses the new system, the supervisor who got his entire team (including the union steward) performing acrobatics with the new process.
No one wants stuff done to them, or even for them. With them goes a lot further. Ask employees, “What’s working well and how do we leverage it? What enhancements do we need? Where should we head next?” All these questions go a long way. Include employees by involving them in your change efforts.
Your Turn
Leave a comment and share with us your best leadership strategy to help your team navigate change.
I started thinking about leadership mistakes just after we picked up some office supplies. We’d left Sebastian, our 12-year-old, in the car while we ran in to grab a few things.
“This guy opened his door and hit your car!” Sebastian announced as Karin and I returned to the car, our arms full of office supplies. He pointed out a small scratch on the door. We laughed about it and how the guy was surprised to find someone in the car he’d just scratched.
The thing is, I don’t mind a few scratches on my car. You can’t speed something down the road at 60 miles per hour, expose it to rain and road debris and expect it to emerge unscathed.
If you’re scared of scratching your car, you’ll never leave the garage. The only way to keep a car in ‘showroom’ condition is to leave it there.
Fear is part of the leadership experience. You may fear to ruin relationships, damaging your reputation, or even losing your job. When you lead, you’ll probably have anxiety and fear as you face the unknown and take risks to move your team and organization forward.
It’s normal to have these fears.
But if you don’t learn how to manage the fears that come with leadership, you’ll stay in “the showroom” and make critical leadership mistakes.
Unmanaged fear incapacitates you and leads to a range of leadership mistakes. These insidious mistakes are dangerous because they can feel rational.
You know that feeling of unease that creeps up and prompts you to procrastinate or avoid doing something?
Listen to it.
But instead of doing what it says (avoiding the problem), use it as an alarm calling for your attention. The thing you feel like avoiding is exactly what should have your full attention. Dive in and get it done.
Even if you don’t tell them what’s going on, your team will figure it out. When you’re paralyzed with fear, your leadership credibility slowly erodes.
When you’re scared, you forget your team. This is one of those particularly brutal leadership mistakes because it cuts you off from one of your greatest strengths. Your team is smart and by working together you can figure it out and get it done…but not if fear isolates you. When you’re alone or isolated, things grow out of proportion.
Reconnect with your team to get a healthy perspective and engage many more minds in solving the problem.
Have you ever had a squirrel get inside your house? They are scared and panicked. Every little noise or motion sends them scampering back and forth, climbing up the walls, knocking over everything. It’s chaos!
When you’re scared, you can do the same thing and leave your people frustrated and confused about their M.I.T.s (Most Important Thing) and expectations.
When you’re motivated by fear, you stop building a positive future as you try to just avoid problems. You can’t inspire your team with a message of “Let’s try not to fail…”
Instead, examine and prepare for the actual (not imagined) consequences.
Your mind can play tricks on you and grow imagined problems to epic proportions. This is why listening to your fear is important. What is it you’re scared of? What would actually happen if that came to pass? What would you do then?
If you can find people who have been in the same situations and learn what they did, that’s even better. The point is to reduce the imagined problem to real-life, know you can handle it, and build a positive future together.
In the absence of information, people fill in the blanks with all sorts of pathological nonsense.
And yet, when you’re afraid, you often stop the flow of information (because you worry about communicating the wrong thing or aren’t sure who you can trust). This feeds into the isolation that cuts you off from the very people that can help you.
When you worry too much about making mistakes, you don’t take risks. When you don’t take healthy risks, you stop learning new things…and you stop learning altogether. Leaders who don’t grow lose credibility.
Perfectionists and high achievers sometimes let fear paralyze them because they fear making a mistake. But even engineers launching a satellite into space know the margin of error within which they can operate.
Mistakes are a good thing. They mean you’re trying something new and stretching. Use them well.
When you’re frightened of being seen as a failure, you might not own up to it and apologize. Effective leaders have the humility to “Own the UGLY,” admit their vulnerabilities, and take responsibility for their mistakes.
Sustained fear erodes your ability to act. That’s the definition of a victim – “This happened and there’s nothing I can do.”
When fear leads to victimhood, one of the best antidotes is to re-empower your self. Do this by asking two simple questions:
What are the results I want to achieve?
What can I do to accomplish those results?
This is the worst of the leadership mistakes because leaders recreate themselves.
Your team is learning from you. If you stay in fear-mode, it won’t be long before your team acts the same way and now you’ve multiplied the leadership mistakes on this list across your entire team.
When you see your team afraid to make mistakes, over-reacting, and unable to build a positive future, it’s time to take a hard look in the mirror and see if they’re feeding off your fear.
Don’t let fear keep you in the showroom. We need you out there, making a difference. You’ll get a few scratches along the way – and that’s okay.
Overcoming your leadership fears takes time and practice. As you practice, you’ll find the situations that caused you two weeks of anxiety will only give you two hours of serious thought.
People with an extreme fear of spiders don’t overcome it by diving into a tank of spiders. They begin by reading about them, by spending time near them in a safe environment and work up to maybe even hold one.
What is the easiest step you can take? Is it to share your concerns with your team? Is it looking for someone who’s been in the same situation? Is it to write down the situation you need to address and plan for likely outcomes?
Leave us a comment and share: How do you manage your leadership fears, stay healthy, and keep your people moving forward?
One of the most challenging management experiences you’ll encounter is when it feels like your team won’t listen.
These times when it feels like your team won’t listen are great opportunities to build your influence. You might be tempted to turn to fear, power, and a raised voice to get things done, but I invite you to pause and look at what’s happening before you do.
When you learn from these moments your effectiveness will soar, but if you allow yourself to get so frustrated that you turn to fear or power to get things done, you lose credibility and trust.
Whenever you have leadership challenges, the first thing to examine is your own desire.
There’s a big difference between wanting what’s best for the team and wanting what’s best for you. So what is it you really want?
If the answer is compliance “When I say jump, they better ask ‘how high?’ on the way up” – then you’re never going to have a team that truly listens. They will do things out of fear when they must and ignore you when they can.
However, if what you want for the team to achieve great results together…then keep reading.
Do the actual words you use mean the same thing to your team that they mean to you? Are you sharing numbers and facts when stories and demonstrations are needed, or do your stories need more data and explanation?
When you don’t hear what people tell you, they naturally think you don’t care, they lose heart, and they’ll stop caring.
Not sure if your team is being heard? Ask a few team members to share with you: “Is there anything you’ve been trying to tell me that I’m just not hearing?”
Be quiet and listen. Thank them for sharing…and respond in time, even if it’s to explain constraints or why you’re taking a different direction. You don’t have to agree, but you do need to hear.
If your people can say, “You don’t know what you’re talking about” and they have evidence to back up their conclusion, well, expect to be ignored.
You build your credibility. You can’t demand it. Can people trust you? Can they rely on you? Take a moment and seriously consider the answer to these questions. If you were on your own team, would you trust you, based only on what you see and experience?
If the values you’re promoting conflict with your team’s values, you’ll have trouble being heard. I worked with a CEO who was disappointed that her employees were leaving work when they were scheduled to leave. She wanted people who valued going the extra distance to get things done. Her employees loved their work, but they also valued their family and friends and considered it nearly immoral to sacrifice family relationships for work.
Look at both the literal words you’re using as well as the attitude behind them.
Do your words and attitude communicate dignity and equal worth? Or do your words and attitude suggest that you’re better than everyone else and they should just do what they’re told?
Your team’s lack of response may be because they don’t understand the consequences. Why is this important? How does it make a difference to other people? To the bottom line? Even military briefings include the reasons and objectives behind the orders.
When you share a task and ask “Are there any questions?” you will likely be met with silence.
Don’t assume that silence means they get it. Silence could mean confusion, embarrassment, or that they think they understand.
Rather, ask your team something like: “Let’s make sure we’re on the same page. What are the three things we’re doing coming out of this meeting? Why does this matter? When will these be finished? Make sure they received what you thought you communicated.
I have coached many frustrated leaders who complain that their team is insubordinate or unresponsive.
So then I ask “When was the last time you shared this task or explained what was supposed to happen?”
Some of the answers I’ve heard include:
If you’ve communicated something once, you haven’t communicated.
As hard as it may be for your ego to accept, your team members have other lives. They have constant challenges confronting them every day.
It’s unrealistic to believe that something you said one time, last year, is on everyone’s mind. If it’s important, be the drummer. Keep the beat and consistently communicate the MITs (Most Important Things.)
People receive information differently. I’m a reader first, audio second, and video third. But many other people get much more from video or other visuals.
As you reinforce the MITs, use different communication techniques.
We recommend 6×3 communication. The idea is to repeat critical information at least six times through three or more channels. For example, you might use a staff meeting, a video, and one-on-one meetings for your three different channels.
When it feels like your team won’t listen, it is easy to get frustrated and give in to the temptation to yell louder. But effective leaders know that when it seems no one’s listening, there are likely other issues that need to be resolved.
If you feel like your team won’t listen, ask yourself these ten questions…and listen to your answers.
Leave us a comment and share: How do you ensure you’ve been heard when communicating with your team?
Creative Commons photo by Bryan Katz
Confident, humble leaders take a moment to privately applaud themselves. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a mini-timeout to tell yourself “Wow! Great job,” particularly for the incremental baby steps that change the game. Privately applauding yourself is vital if others aren’t looking at or caring about your greater mission.
One of the great joys of my new journey is that I get to meet so many kindred spirits from all over the world. I’m honing my “confident-humility” radar-detection system. I’m pleased to introduce Roberto Martinez from Bogota, Columbia to you through his guest post and short video interview.
I met Roberto after a speech I gave at the National Speaker Association’s Business Accelerator Lab. He’s a doctor, a musician, a teacher, a speaker, a husband and father doing important work. You have to pull all of that out of him, though, because mostly he’s a humble man working to inspire good where it needs to happen most.
I was inspired by his thinking on taking time to “applaud yourself.” (Watch the video to hear more.)
See my interview with Roberto here.
Some time ago a friend of mine asked me how to stay true to your journey toward fulfilling your dreams. After all, it’s hard. There are competing pressures. Here’s my best thinking for the LGL community.
The synergy of these six steps will inspire you, and others, to support your vision.
I would love to hear your insights and thoughts. Feel free to reach out. Roberto@rmleadinglife.com
Visit Roberto’s site rmleadinglife.com or find him on Facebook, or Twitter @rm_leadinglife
Is your team struggling with poor results, apathy, and feelings of being overwhelmed? Stop and consider if they really understand the big picture.
Can they grasp the real meaning in their work beyond the growing daily to-do list. As we continue our series on the biggest mistakes team leaders make, we focus on the perils of under communicating the big picture.
Kelly’s team is really busy. They’ve been working hard and getting by, but results are stagnant. She’s tried everything: more recognition, contests, she even came in dressed as a superhero to try to get the team riled up. Each of these stunts worked for a day or so, but then the results returned to their normal mediocre state and the stress levels crept right back up.
Frustrated, Kelly went old school and writing warnings for those at the bottom of the stack rank. That got a few people’s attention, but now morale is in the tank.
She asked Frank, one of her most dedicated team members, how he was feeling:
I’m getting pretty stressed out too. It just seems that we’ve got this really long list of things to do and the work just keeps coming. I feel like I’m on a treadmill and am just running toward nowhere.
When Kelly asked if he understood, why they had been asked to work so hard this summer, he just shrugged his shoulders. Chances are, Kelly could make a big difference by doing a better job of communicating the big picture.
If you’re faced with apathy, absenteeism, low-engagement or poor morale, chances are people are having trouble connecting what you’re asking them to do, to a compelling and meaningful “why.”
Communicating the big picture is a skill that’s often lost in early leadership development programs. After all, big-picture thinking is for execs, right? No. Everyone needs to get where they fit in. Many team leaders under-communicate the big picture for the following reasons.
All the other work you do as a team leader will be undermined if your team doesn’t have a strong unifying sense or where they’re headed. Ask your team today. Can they articulate your team’s mission in one sentence?
And of course our book, Winning Well: A Manager’s Guide to Getting Results– Without Losing Your Soul
7 Ways to Help Your Team Deal With Ambiguity
7 Strategic Questions Your Team Should Be Able to Answer
Weak leaders waffle and shape-shift. They’re easily swayed by popular opinion or the path of least resistance.
Their point of view is remarkably consistent with whatever their boss says, or send messages that will cause the least amount of work. They attract other easy people, who’ll just go with the flow. The flow turns to stagnant mediocrity.
Inspiring leaders have a more deliberate, inspiring point of view. They’re attracted to, and attract, others with carefully considered perspectives.
“The most difficult work most professionals do is getting someone else to agree with their point of view and take action. The second most difficult work professionals do is developing a point of view in the first place.”~ Seth Godin
Strong leaders articulate a recognizable point of view:
V – Vision: Your expectations are clear and easy to follow. People get where you are headed and why. Clarity brings consistency and comfort.
I – Integrity: You do what you say and say what you do. Your team knows what to expect from you, and what behaviors you expect from them.
E – Empowerment: An inspiring point of view guides, scaffolds and empowers action. No waiting around for permission and guidance. You stay out of the weeds because you know your team understands your perspective. They don’t have to run to you for decisions, they can just ask WW_D?
W – Wisdom: You’re clear but not stuck. You help others clarify their own thinking and articulate their point of view. You know the best results come after careful consideration of diverse perspectives. You welcome debate.
Consider your point of view on leadership or parenting, marriage, friendship, customer service. What beliefs do you hold most strongly? How do you communicate your point of view to your followers or children, spouse, friends, customers? If you’re brave, ask them. Do you like what you hear?
Kerri knows exactly what she wants in her “some day” husband. He’s her intellectual peer, has common interests, and is hot – like her. She’s got big plans for her large hypothetical family.
She’s convinced Mr. Right is right around the corner. She only looks up when he matches the picture on her vision board. She doesn’t date much.
“We all have possibilities we don’t know about. We can do things we don’t even dream we can do.”~ Dale Carnegie
It happens in careers too. Have a vision, mind-map your life, set goals, make plans, get up early, hustle. Without direction, you’ll under-achieve. With over-direction you’ll destroy your potential.
Beware of the downsides of your know-it-all pursuit. Laser-like focus burns past peripheral opportunities. Strategically built networks exclude the “weirdos” you need.
“Tenacity is using new data to make new decisions to find new pathways to find new ways to achieve a goal when the old ways didn’t work.”~ Seth Godin
Dogged pursuit of exactly what you want scares those who’ve got relevant guidance. Pushing too hard, pushes away possibilities:
Think big, set goals, make plans and then…
