When it comes to critical messages, communicating once is never enough. In this episode, get practical (and creative) ways you can master 5×5 communication and ensure your team understands what matters most.
Tag Archives: communication
A Practical and Free Way to Get Great 360 Feedback
Do you know where you stand with your boss? Do you have a good sense of what your peers really think about you? Has it been a minute since your last formal 360 feedback review? Or, is a 360 Feedback something you’ve heard about, but your company hasn’t quite gotten there yet?
You don’t have to wait for HR. You can build your own Do It Yourself (DIY) 360 Feedback Process to get the feedback you crave.
We often include DIY 360 Feedback in our long-term leadership development programs. Participants frequently tell us they like this approach even better than a fancy on-line tool because it pushes them to have much-needed, real-deal, one-on-one conversations with their boss, peers, and direct reports.
The upside (or downside), depending on your perspective, is that it’s not anonymous.
But if you start with a foundation of trust, really listen, and respond well, you will not only get the feedback you need but also build a foundation for future dialogue.
Start Here To Get The 360 Feedback You Crave
At the end of this article, we’ve included instructions for a DIY (Do It Yourself 360 Feedback) that we use in our programs. But before you go there, here are a few simple foundations to consider.
1. Ask for the Truth
Set up some time with your boss and peers to really ask for feedback. Avoid the generic, “Do you have any feedback for me?” Or letting them off the hook, by accepting “You’re doing everything just right.”
Ask questions about areas you’re specifically looking to improve.
“What specifically do you think I could do to run our project meetings more effectively and efficiently?”
“I’ve been under a great deal of stress recently, and worry that I might be rubbing some people the wrong way. Is there anything I can do to improve the way I’ve been communicating with you?”
“If you had one piece of advice that could really help me take our team’s performance to the next level, what would that be?”
2. Say Thank You
When someone shares a hard truth, especially about you, thank the person for having the courage, taking the time, and caring enough to share it with you.
3. Respond
If you ask for input, take the time to respond. Even if the ideas aren’t actionable, when you acknowledge that the ideas were heard and considered, you increase the likelihood of hearing more in the future.
4. Never, Ever Shoot the Messenger
If someone has the heart and courage to bring you a difficult truth, even if you vehemently disagree, keep your cool. If you attack them, they won’t bring you another concern.
5. Find Your Truth-Tellers
There are people who understand their team, environment, or processes and are willing to voice their observations. Find these people, keep in regular communication, and let them know you value their observations.
6. Check Your Behavior
If you suspect you are not hearing the truth from those around you, it is time to examine how you are interacting with others. Be sure your paying attention to the items on this list.
If you are struggling to see it, ask others for input, find a mentor, or consider a leadership coach.
7. Model It
The best way to get people to tell you the truth is to build a reputation as someone who tells other people the truth. Start from a place of deep caring with their best interest at heart. If you want more truth-tellers, be a truth-teller.
How to Get Started: A DIY 360 Feedback Tool
See Also: Why The Best Leaders Crave Feedback
What Employees are Yearning For in Remote One-on-Ones
If you really want to connect and support your team, there’s no better place to start than a great cadence of meaningful one-on-ones.
And yet, even before this transition to remote work, when we would ask employees about their experience with one-on-ones, we often heard nervous laughter and responses like these:
“One-on-ones, what are those (hahaha)?”
“She has an open door. She tells us to come by whenever we want. (Of course, she’s never there. Hahaha)”
“I just count on windshield time with my manager between client visits. He’s so busy, that’s the only time I know I’ve got him captive (hahaha).”
“He just leaves me alone. I do a good job. I guess he would tell me if I was screwing up (hahaha).”
Obviously, these responses are less than ideal, but it’s even harder to wing it now. So much is changing—and fast.
In the last few months, when we’ve asked employees about one-on-ones, the tenor of the conversations has changed from nervous laughter to deep concern.
Employees are yearning for MORE DIRECTION and CONNECTION in their remote one-on-ones.
“Dear Boss, here’s what I need most in a remote one on one…”
Today we share what we’re hearing employees need most right now in their one-on-ones. We encourage you to share this article with your team and to talk about what’s working in your remote one-on-ones and what you can do to take them to the next level.
Clarity: Help Me Understand What’s Most Important Right Now
“I understand that you don’t have all the answers. Priorities change. But please give me a fighting chance of working on the right things, because quite frankly, I’m feeling overwhelmed and I don’t have time for rework or wasted effort. Please use our one-on-one to ensure I know what matters most this week, and what I need to do to be successful.”
Caring: Show Me I Matter More Than My KPIs
“It’s been a rough week. I’m tired. I signed up to be a working parent, but not a working parent with no daycare! I know you’re busy, but before you jump right in and talk about the project, can you take a minute to see me and check-in to see if I’m doing okay?”
Consistency: Give Me a Cadence I Can Count On
“I know your heart is in the right place and that you’re being pulled in a million directions too. But this is the third time you’ve canceled our one-on-one. I had my list all ready to cover with you. And now I’ve got to track you down. I scheduled my one-on-ones with my team AFTER ours so I would have answers for them. Now I’m heading into those with unanswered questions which is embarrassing and is slowing all of us down.”
Credibility: Be Real With Me, So I Can Be Real With You
“You know what made me feel great, that one time when you opened up and really shared how you were feeling. It made me feel so much better to know that you’re scared and tired too. But since then, you’ve just been so perky and positive—and I wonder, are you for real?”
Capacity: Ask Me What I Need
What I need to hear more than anything right now is: “How can I be most helpful?”
Curiosity: Ask Me For Ideas
I’m learning a lot and I’ve got some great ideas about how we can do things better. But, I feel awkward sharing my ideas if I’m not asked.
Boss, I really care about you, this company, and our success. I’d love to have some time to pull up with you each week in a quick one-on-one to share as we work through this important time together.
Sincerely,
Your courageous employee.
Your Turn:
What would you add? What’s working well in your remote one-on-ones?
See Also:
How to Overcome One of the Biggest Challenges from Working From Home
Leaders Share About Courage: A Frontline Festival
Welcome to the Frontline Festival. As we prepare to launch our new book, Courageous Cultures: How to Build Teams of Micro-Innovators, Problem Solvers, and Customer Advocates, we invited thought leaders to share their best writing on courage. Thanks to Joy and Tom Guthrie of Vizwerx Group for the great pic and to all our contributors.
To learn more about our Courageous Cultures research, to download a free chapter of our book, or to sign-up for pre-order bonuses click here.
Courage in Communication![Employees lack confidence.]()
Julie Winkle Giulioni of JulieWinkleGiulioni.com shares Supervision Means Having to Say... Sometimes being the boss means having the courage to say things like “I was wrong” and “I’m sorry.” This article features other powerful and courageous statements that define leadership and drive results. Follow Julie.
Paula Kiger of Big Green Pen provides What Leaders Can Do. In these three components of effective leadership, we take a look at being courageous enough to stop relying on digital communication. It contains a message about focusing on what you can do, not what you can’t. Follow Paula.
Courageous Vulnerability
Lisa Kohn from Chatsworth Consulting Group offers this perspective: Vulnerability is not a dirty word, it’s a leadership skill. Follow Lisa.
The Courage to Chart the Course and Try New Things
Dr. Artika Tyner of Planting People Growing Justice Leadership shares a perspective: Courage requires one to venture from the dimensions of what is known to what could be. This is the foundation of innovation by which a leader seeks to look to the future and discover a world full of possibilities. In this journey, the leader comes forth with new thought processes and new paradigms for change. Follow Artika.
Wally Bock of Three Star Leadership offers 4 C Vitamins for Better Leadership. Here are some C vitamins that will make your leadership better. Be sure to do them every day. Follow Wally.
Maria Tanski-Phillips of Patriot Software offers Finding the Courage to Start a Business Once and for All. If you want to start your own company, you have to have a whole lot of determination and courage. Use these five tips to finally make the big leap and muster up the courage to start a business. Follow Maria.
One isn’t necessarily born with courage, but one is born with potential. Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency. We can’t be kind, true, merciful, generous, or honest. ~Maya Angelou
The Courage We Need Right Now
David Grossman of The Grossman Group shares CEOs Leading with Conviction. As we all sort through the recent events and determine how best to respond, we wanted to share a few CEO statements with you. We think you’ll find them useful and, in some cases, inspiring. Follow David.
David Moser of Decisive Blog shares Why I’d Run an Airline with Zero Planes. The major COVID disruption pushed many businesses into a defensive posture, laying off large portions of their workforce. Bold leaders can take a creative risk with seemingly untouchable assets to prioritize their people and emerge a strengthened organization. This mental model, applied here to the airline industry, maps a workflow for leaders in any setting. Follow David.
Jon Verbeck of Verbeck Associates CFO Services offers Thoughts on Courage. With business significantly changing and the “new reality” completely unknown, courage and trust are so needed. Jon shares his thoughts on the combination of knowledge, faith, and action that make up the definition of courage. Follow Jon.
We must build dikes of courage to hold back the flood of fear. ~Martin Luther King, Jr.
Shelley Row of Shelley Row Associates shares Four Anchors to Weather Any Storm, from her participation on the PharmCast podcast. Thriving through storms of uncertainty takes courage. Here’s help. Follow Shelley
Beth Beutler of H.O.P.E. Unlimited shares: “Our courage is sometimes strengthened through the efforts of others who choose to encourage us. The dictionary defines encourage as ‘give support, confidence or hope to (someone.)’ There are many ways to encourage others. Pay attention to what resonates with your teammates and co-workers and become someone who is known to encourage others.” Follow Beth.
S. Chris Edmonds of Driving Results through Culture provides this Culture Leadership Charge: Rise Up, outlining how leaders can inspire change in their organizations and communities to create justice, equality, and opportunity for every human. Follow Chris.
Are you a leadership writer? We’d love to have you join us with your articles, videos, podcast episodes, or simply your best thinking on the topic (even if you don’t have additional content to link.) Our topic for July is mentoring. Click here to submit your thoughts and content!
How to Help Your Team Manage Change
Connection is key to help your team manage change.
When you have a clear picture of where you want to go but your team won’t come along as quickly as you want, it can feel like you’re trying to pull a car out of the mud—it’s stuck and everyone’s spinning their wheels. Pull too hard or too fast and you risk a disaster like this:
The internet is full of towing failures like this one. There are a couple of common mistakes that plague well-meaning people trying to tow a friend’s car out of trouble—and these same mistakes can prevent you from helping your team manage change.
Help Your Team Manage Change by Avoiding These 3 Mistakes
Mistake #1: Poor Connection
A good tow depends on a solid connection between the two vehicles. For example, don’t hook your tow cable to the bumper of either vehicle. This is a weak connection. In many of those towing fails, they didn’t attach their cable to the car’s frame, and when they pulled, they tore the car apart.
Just as you want to connect a tow cable to a car’s frame, as a leader, your influence depends on the strength of your connection to your people. Share the meaning and purpose of the work. Know what your people value, and connect those values to their daily tasks.
The most meaningful connections you make are with shared values and clear reasons why activities must happen. Without these connections, you’ve probably asked your team to do something that makes no sense to them (with little chance of success).
You also strengthen your connection to your people when you include their wisdom and perspective in decision-making. Ask what they think the team is capable of, why they do what they do, and how they would improve the results they produce.
Mistake #2: Rapid Direction Change
When you tow, you don’t want to pull the car sideways or you could rip off a tire or an entire axle. Instead, start by pulling the vehicle in the direction it was going or else directly opposite that direction. This minimizes stress on the car and gets the wheels rolling.
Similarly, with your team, you have to know their current capacity, training, and priorities. If you ask something of them they don’t know how to do, or that their current workload can’t accommodate, or something that conflicts with their current priorities, you’ll end up frustrated.
We’ve worked with many User managers who respond to this scenario by pulling harder (they yell, belittle their people, and get upset). This is the equivalent of pulling at the wrong angle and tearing the axle off the car. At best, your people lose respect for you. At worse, they rebel, quit, or sabotage success.
When you need to get your team going a different direction, start by examining the capacity, training, and priorities. What can you remove from their plate? What training can you get for them? How can you help re-prioritize and get them rolling in the new direction? Even a day or two spent in making these adjustments can help your team manage change and transform faster.
Mistake #3: Moving too Fast
When you tow a vehicle, you don’t want to slam on the accelerator. When the road is muddy and you accelerate too quickly, your tires will spin and dig into the mud. When the road is dry and you accelerate too fast, you’ll damage one vehicle or else snap the tow cable.
As a manager, you have a clear picture of where you’re going and what needs to happen to get there. It’s obvious to you. But what’s obvious to you won’t be obvious to your people without significant communication—particularly in times of crisis and change.
We’ve worked with countless frustrated managers who told their team about a change in procedure once, six months ago and are now angry that their team isn’t implementing the change. To pull gently and build momentum, you’ve got to frequently communicate what’s happening, why it’s happening, and the specific tasks each person is responsible for, and then check for understanding. At the end of the discussions, ask team members to share what they understand the expectations to be.
Slow down just a little, and help your people build momentum in the new direction.
Your Turn
The towing metaphor has its limits. In fact, the better connection you build with your team, the more you help them to self-manage and prioritize what matters most, the more rapidly your team can manage change and respond to sudden shifts.
We’ve been so impressed by the leadership and rapid changes we’ve seen many teams make in response to this crisis and we’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment and share What is your #1 way to help your team manage change quickly and respond to rapidly shifting circumstances?
4 Ways to Stop Frustrating Misunderstandings
Frustrating misunderstandings aren’t inevitable.
I was sitting in the car outside our house, waiting for our son to join me on a trip to the grocery store.
After waiting for a while, I called his cell phone. “Are you coming?”
“Where are you?” he asked.
“In the car, waiting for you,” I said. “Where are YOU?”
“I’m at the desk,” he replied. “I thought we’re working on our creative writing project?”
We’d both been in the same conversation, but somehow, each of us had come away with two very different understandings of what was happening.
I thought we were going shopping. Our son thought we were working on a creative writing project.
How could we have interpreted the same words so differently?
What Causes Those Frustrating Misunderstandings
Communication is a funny thing. You’re never as clear as you think you are because several problems get in the way.
Your words make sense to you, but those words can mean something entirely different to another person. You each bring a lifetime of experiences and interpretations to every conversation. Those filters color our understanding – and cause a host of frustrating misunderstandings.
For example, take something as simple as “Let’s take out the trash.” Depending on your team’s experience and interpretation, they could hear:
- I will take out the trash.
- You will take out the trash.
- We’re both going to take out the trash.
- We’re showing that we’re all in this together.
- We’re doing work that’s beneath us.
- No work is beneath anyone.
- We can’t afford a cleaning service.
- We’re scrappy and efficient.
- You don’t value the important work I could be doing instead of taking out the trash.
- We’ll take the trash to the front door.
- We’ll take the trash to the dumpster.
And that’s assuming they heard your words correctly. You can imagine how comedies would have someone hear “Let’s check out that rash.”
It turns out that when I said, “Let’s go shop” what our son heard was, “Let’s chop.” Which he interpreted to mean “chop-chop” as in, “Let’s get to it.” Since creative writing had been on his mind, he filtered the encouragement to action through the lens of what had his attention.
In organizations and teams, these kinds of misunderstandings aren’t so funny. They cause endless frustration, headaches, lost productivity, and aggravation.
Close the Loop
Effective leaders work hard to remove the chance of misunderstanding. You do this by the example you set, by understanding who you’re talking to, connecting what to why, and checking for understanding.
Your Example
It’s leadership 101—lead by example. But it’s more than a trust-building boost to your credibility. Your example clarifies your words and helps everyone understand exactly what you mean.
Understand Who You’re Talking To
Get to know your people and you can tailor your communication to reach mutual understanding quickly. For example, if you have a detail-minded person who takes things literally, understanding that will help you avoid theoretical language. They need to know what, specifically, needs to happen.
People are different. How can you give everyone the best chance of understanding and action?
Connect What to Why
In the absence of information, many people fill in their own stories—and they’re usually not pleasant. Nowhere does this happen more than in filling in the “why” behind what’s been asked.
Eg: Why are we taking out the trash? It must be – we’re broke, the boss doesn’t like our work, they don’t know what we do, they don’t know who I am, it’s a punishment.
Eliminate misunderstanding by clarifying the why behind what you ask.
Check for Understanding
There are two ways to check for understanding: actions and emotions.
Check for Understanding #1:
The action-focused check for understanding ensures a mutually shared understanding of the activity. It looks like this:
“Let’s do a quick check for understanding—what are we doing after lunch?” “Yes—we’re all taking out the trash.” “And why are we taking it out?” “No, it’s not because we’ve done anything wrong—it’s because we’ve got another group in here after us and it’s going to smell awful if we leave it in the trash—and that’s what we’d want them to do for us.”
Check for Understanding #2:
The emotion-focused check for understanding gives your team a chance to process what’s happening and surfaces any issues that might arise. It looks like this:
Leader: “Great meeting. I’m super excited about this strategy. Before we end, I’d like to ask, how is everyone feeling?”
Team member 1: “Well, I’m excited about it too, but I’m also worried about how we will do this considering our other priorities?”
Team member 2: “I’m feeling overwhelmed. These are wonderful ideas and I really want to do them, but I don’t know where to begin.”
Once you know these issues exist, you can help your team move through them, adjust expectations, or remove roadblocks.
Your Turn
In remote work settings, closing the loop and ensuring shared understanding is even more important when we don’t have the visual cues and reinforcement we’re used. As you implement long-term crisis-related health and safety plans, these four steps will help avoid frustrating misunderstandings and keep everyone healthy and safe.
We’d love to hear from you: What are some of your best techniques to ensure you and your team communicate clearly with one another?
An Easy Way to Improve Your Relationships With Your Direct Reports
Even if you have an open door, and are constantly asking your direct reports how you can improve, chances are your employees are holding back.
Particularly if you’re generally a great boss, they figure “Why complain? It could be so much worse.”
Most employees we talk with have ideas for how their boss could be more supportive. And yet, when we ask them if they’ve had that conversation with their manager, most of the time the answer is “no.”
In fact, when Karin was teaching a leadership course in a top MBA program, she asked her students if they had ideas on how to improve the effectiveness of their relationship with their manager. As you can imagine, every hand in the room shot up with a lot of knowing chuckles.
And then when she asked how many of her students had shared at least one of those insights with their managers, only one student raised her hand.
If these fast-track (not shy) millennials, serious about their success, were holding back, it’s probably a good indicator that others are too.
And, if you’re like most managers we talk with, it goes the other way as well. You know your relationship with your direct reports could be better. Perhaps you’re not getting the support you need in a particular area. Or communication is breaking down in some way. Maybe you need more ideas or for them to challenge your thinking.
But it’s hard to carve out the time to have that conversation, so you settle for “good enough.”
An Easy Way to Open Up the Communication With Your Direct Reports
We use this tool with managers in some of our long-term leadership development programs to open up two-way communication between leaders and their direct reports. We thought it might be helpful for you too. If you give it a try, we’d love to hear how it goes. Drop us a line at info@letsgrowleaders.com.
Why the Tool Works
The tool is designed to reinforce the reciprocal nature of the manager-employee relationship.
It’s not just about what the manager is doing well or could do better, or what the direct report is doing well or could improve.
Both the manager and the employee rate the effectiveness of the relationship on the same dimensions.
The tool is designed to encourage both parties to take responsibility for co-creating the relationship and the results they produce.
How to Use The Tool
- Explain why you think this is an important exercise. It’s important that your direct reports feel safe and know that you are genuinely open to the dialogue. If the basic trust is not yet there, work on that first. This is an advanced communication tool that requires a foundation of trust.
- Ask your direct reports to complete the quick assessment with as much candor as possible before you meet.
- Complete the assessment yourself, based on your relationship with each direct report. (Note, it should be different for each person.)
- Schedule a one-on-one meeting with each of your direct reports to discuss and celebrate where your relationship is working well, and identify areas for improvement.
- Align on one or two specific actions you both agree to do to improve your relationship.
- Schedule the finish. Set up a time in the future (a month or so out is probably best) that you will meet to discuss progress.
You can download the pdf of this tool here.
Leading Through Crisis and Change
Coronavirus has turned the world upside down. When you’re called on to lead your team through crisis and rapid change, focus on clear, concise, calm communication. In this episode, get a practical example and more ways you can lead your team through crisis and change.
5 Reasons Your Team Just Doesn’t Get It
When your team just doesn’t get it, you’ve got a chance to level up.
It’s a lament we’ve heard from many leaders—usually accompanied by frustrated pacing or a discouraged slouch with their head in their hands: “I don’t know what else to do. My team just doesn’t get it.”
This is one of the most frustrating leadership experiences. You’re working hard, moving fast, and passionate about what you do, but your people seem clueless. They don’t focus on the MITs (Most Important Thing). They seem lackadaisical about the details that matter most, and they don’t seem worried at all about the strategic issues keeping you up at night.
5 Reasons Your Team Just Doesn’t Get It (and what to do about it)
1. They don’t know what you know.
You earned that insight, energy, and wisdom. You know what’s likely to happen because you’ve been there. But your people might not get it because they don’t have your experience or knowledge.
Have you ever tried to describe the taste of an orange to someone who’s never eaten one? It’s challenging. It’s so fundamental that you’ll use it as a baseline for other conversations: “It tastes like an orange, only more bitter.” But someone who’s never tasted an orange won’t get it. You’ve got to start with them tasting an orange and build from there.
If you want your people to be able to think as you do, give them the same information you used to decide. Connect what they do to the strategic reasons for their work. Help them understand how their decisions affect the customers, their team, and themselves.
2. You haven’t said it so they understand it.
We are professional communicators. We speak for a living—and yet, just this week, Karin said to David, “Can you finish one of those sentences? I’m not following you.”
Later that day, David looked at Karin and said, “I understand all the words you just said, but feel like I’m missing something important.” Communication isn’t always easy—even for professionals!
You probably don’t communicate as clearly as you think you do. In fact, we can almost guarantee it.
The words in your head make sense to you, but that doesn’t mean they’ll have the same meaning for another person—if they even hear all of them. Your message winds its way through an obstacle course of competing priorities, distractions, and the filters each person has in their head.
To guarantee that people hear and receive your most critical messages, use 5×5 communication (say it five times, five different ways) and check for understanding (ask people to share what they heard, using their own words).
When you use five different ways of communicating and consistently check for understanding, you will find the communication tools that work most effectively for your people.
3. You hired the wrong person.
There are also times where someone doesn’t get it because their values don’t align with yours or they lack the skills they need to perform well. One of the most common places this happens is in demanding, stressful jobs. Desperate for bodies, recruiters undersell the challenges and what it takes to thrive in the role.
If you’re regularly hearing exit interviews like “It was way harder than I expected” or “This isn’t what I thought it would be” then it’s time to look at your hiring process.
When a role or culture is demanding, don’t shy away from it. We have both hired for teams that asked more from people than most people would want to give. Don’t hide it; lead with it. Eg: “This role isn’t for most people. It’s demanding and hard. And it will give you an opportunity to make a real difference to our customers, clients, and your career.”
Follow up with behavior-based interview questions that help you identify if your candidates have shown this character, capacity, and values they’ll need to succeed.
4. They get it—and wish you would too.
It’s quite possible that you’re the one who doesn’t get it.
Doug is a senior leader who was frustrated by his team’s performance. He’d done an incredible job training them in the methods and processes that he’d introduced and that had fueled his company’s success over the past twenty years.
The problem was that technology had changed. His customers, and the way they consumed his product, had changed. Doug had been a victim of his own success. His people understood their customer and half-heartedly met Doug’s expectations while trying to fulfill their customer’s expectations.
His team got it. But Doug had to relearn what success looked like and how to lead a team that wanted to succeed but needed to do it differently than Doug had.
5. You don’t ask for what you really want.
Another common cause when your team just doesn’t get it is that your measurements ask for something different from what you really want. People focus on getting a score and forget the game. Common examples include:
- The target has changed recently, but you haven’t updated your 5×5 communication and measurement strategy. Everyone’s still working toward the old definition of success.
- People hit their KPIs, but focus on them exclusively and ignore the strategy or experience that the numbers represent.
- Too many measurements obscure what matters most. Eg: Your customer service checklist has 54 items and people can score well on the rubric without providing a great customer experience.
- You had a hidden benchmark that you never shared. You likely took this measurement for granted, but then realized that people with different experiences or personalities needed to know it’s important.
The key to solving the measurement problem is to ask clearly for what you want. Help everyone focus on a few meaningful metrics that paint a complete picture of success. Connect those numbers to the strategy and the specific behaviors that make the numbers meaningful.
One way to know that your team gets it is frequently to check for understanding about what truly matters most. Eg “Why do we track these referrals—what does that represent? What should it mean when the numbers are good? What do we do that gets us the numbers we want to see?”
These questions are brief micro-engagements that continually reconnect your people to the strategy and behaviors behind the numbers.
Your Turn
It’s frustrating when your team just doesn’t get it, but it’s also a huge chance to get better and improve your leadership, processes, or communication. We’d love to hear from you: What have you learned when your team just doesn’t get it that made you a better leader?
Stop Emailing When You Should Have a Meeting
Have a meeting for more bandwidth and speed.
Recently we were delivering a leadership development program when Annia, a senior leader in the firm, raised her hand and addressed the room: “I’ve noticed that many of us quickly send an email rather than picking up the phone or when we could have a meeting in person. I know I’ve done it too – you just want to get the issue off your list. Maybe I’m old-school here, but it seems to me that we can’t build relationships or solve problems as quickly by email.”
Some younger leaders in the room smiled sheepishly and admitted that they were very comfortable communicating by text, voice message, and email, but that they felt awkward on the phone. Others pointed out the efficiency or need for written communication. As they talked, Annia asked us for our insights about when to have a meeting or use other forms of communication.
The Communications Matrix
Your goal is to choose the form of communication that is most effective and efficient for the content you need to convey or discuss. The communications matrix can help you choose the format that will work best for your needs.
There are two variables to modern communication: time and location. People can communicate at the same time or at different times. Communication can happen at the same location or at different locations.
Let’s take a quick look at the different types of communication that happen based on time and location:
Same Time—Same Place: Traditional face-to-face meeting.
Same Time—Different Places: This includes phone calls and video conferences.
Different time—Different Places: Email, text messages, podcasts, group chats, and recorded videos.
Different time—Same Place: Posters, signs, and kiosks.
None of these forms of communication is always good or better than others. For example, it would be foolish to hold a meeting reminding everyone to remove their personal items from the refrigerator by Friday afternoon so it can be cleaned. A sign on the refrigerator door is adequate.
To choose the best form of communication, you’ve got to pay attention to content.
The Best Communication to Get the Job Done
When you’re deciding whether to have a meeting, make a call, or send an email—think about the emotions involved, what’s at stake, and the speed with which you need to act. Emotion, speed, and importance require bandwidth (the amount of information that given and received in an amount of time).
As you start in the upper right with posters and kiosks, those are very low-bandwidth forms of communication. It will take a while before everyone sees it (and some never will).
Move down to emails and text messages and the bandwidth increases. Everyone is likely to see the message and (if you’ve established team norms) and take action. Email is best for short amounts of information that don’t require discussion and have little emotion.
Now, move over to the lower left where phone calls and video conferences increase the bandwidth. You can pick up meaning and emotion text doesn’t allow and make decisions more rapidly.
Finally, as you move to the upper left quadrant with face-to-face meetings, you have the maximum bandwidth. The full spectrum of non-verbals, tone, inflection, and human connection allows you to decide more quickly, engage in higher-emotion conversations, and build relationships.
When to Have a Meeting
Effective leaders choose the best form of communication for their purpose. Like Annia recommended, when you want to build a relationship or talk about a difficult subject, use the highest bandwidth form of communication you can. Face-to-face if possible. If that’s not an option, then video chat, and then a phone call. For a quick meeting recap, background information, or question, email is often perfect.
Leaders who haven’t mastered the communication matrix send emails when they should have a meeting and call a meeting when an email would have sufficed. That wastes everyone’s time and frustrates your people.
Look at your content and purpose, then choose the lowest bandwidth form of communication that will get the job done.
Your Turn
Leave us a comment and share your best suggestion for when to have a meeting vs sending an email.
You might also like:
Three Simple Secrets to Remarkable Meetings
How to Take Charge of Your Remote Meeting
Meetings that Get Results and People Want to Attend (podcast)
Should You Have a Meeting or Send an Email (podcast)
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