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7 Steps to Stop the Drama - a Leader's Ultimate Guide

7 Steps to Stop Workplace Drama – A Leader’s Ultimate Guide

by | Oct 8, 2018 | By Karin Hurt, Results & Execution, Winning Well |

Life is crazy; work doesn’t have to be.
Stop the workplace drama for deeper influence and impact.

Are you tired of dealing with workplace drama? Are you desperate to stop the tantrums, gossip, rumors, and other antics and focus on making a deeper impact work?

Maybe you have a boss who thrives on adrenalin-fueled fire drills, loves to shout “stop everything and get everyone in here now!” And yet, refuses to do the planning necessary to avoid workplace drama.

Or perhaps it’s your co-worker who is always in your cube taking up time, worried about how something isn’t working, the latest mistake by a colleague, and who blows every problem out of proportion.

Workplace drama eats your productivity, consumes your emotional energy, and wastes valuable decision-making energy. But when you’re leading people, there will always be some level of drama. It takes many forms, but even the most mellow accountants and engineers can encounter drama.

Effective leaders master the ability to de-escalate drama and redirect people to productive activity. These seven steps are your ultimate guide to stopping nonsense, building healthy relationships, and achieving breakthrough results.

7 Steps to Stop the Workplace Drama

1. Ground Yourself

You won’t be effective if you’re swept up and washed away in the storm of other people’s drama. Anchor yourself. Know what matters most, build connections that keep you centered, steep in the values you want to live, and approach work with a positive “we can solve this” attitude.

At the same time, be prepared for problems. Disruptions are a fact of life. People won’t always do what they’re supposed to. These are not reasons to panic or freak out.

When there are problems, your grounded energy will help your team to maintain their composure and focus on the real MIT (Most Important Thing).

2. Set Clear Expectations

Just as you ensure everyone is on the same page regarding key business outcomes, you want to set expectations around how the team will react to challenges, how they resolve disagreements, and what to do when someone lets you down. Teach them the fine art of saying “no.”

Give your people the tools to have tough conversations with one another. Talk about how the team will respond when (not if) there’s a problem. Rehearse. Practice. Role-play and be ready. You’ll prevent problems from catching fire and blowing up into unproductive drama.

These first two steps help you prepare for drama-inducing situations before they happen. Now let’s look at what to do when the workplace drama happens:

3. Acknowledge Their Feelings / Concern

When someone is fired up, one of the most effective ways to de-escalate the situation is to reflect on how they’re feeling. eg: “It sounds like you’re frustrated.”

You’re not telling them how to feel or saying you agree with their interpretation. You’re just them know you understand how they are feeling. Until that strong emotion is acknowledged, you’re unlikely to be able to move forward. Often, this acknowledgment and understanding is all the person needs.

4. Ask Rational Clarifying Questions

After you acknowledge their feeling, your next goal is to get the problem into perspective. Ask straightforward questions that help quantify the real issue.

For example, when someone comes to you wound up because “I’m facing an insurrection! Everyone is fighting the new system and this will never work!” you might ask: “Who is having a hard time?” “What are they finding challenging?”

It’s one thing for the world to be on fire, but it’s another when it’s just Liz in Accounting and Jeff in Marketing who haven’t figured out how to get the data they need.

Push for the specifics that define the real problem (not the emotional problem) that’s underneath the workplace drama.

5. Redirect to “How Can We” Questions

Once you’ve got the problem identified, asking a “How can we?” question helps pull the person out of reacting and into problem-solving. The human brain isn’t able to hold onto intense emotion at the same time as holding curiosity.

When you ask “How can we solve this?” you’re also communicating that you care, that you trust them to be able to come up with solutions, and that a solution is possible. That’s a lot of workplace drama-erasing, problem-solving power for one short question.

6. Identify Next Steps

As they come up with solutions, translate those into specific actions that can be taken (the sooner the better). Ideally, these are actions they can take to help solve the issue. Sometimes there will be steps for you to take as well.

Either way, don’t allow the situation to resolve without specific commitments to action.

7. Finish Strong

Schedule a specific time when you and the other person will meet to review the actions both of you have taken, their impact, and what comes next. This is a critical step that prevents this particular dramatic situation from happening again. Don’t waste this conversation. If you do the drama will be back before you know it. Finish strong.

Other articles you may enjoy:

Psychological Safety: Why People Don’t Speak Up at Work

Leadership Skill: 6 Leadership Competencies You Can’t Lead Without

Your Turn

When you use these seven steps, you’ll prevent unnecessary workplace drama. Your team will have the tools to deal with problems productively. For team members with a more drama-loving personality, walking them through steps 3 – 7 will guide them to more productive behaviors.

We’d love to hear from you: what’s your best tip to stop workplace drama, calm things down, and help everyone focus on moving forward?

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Karin Hurt

Karin Hurt helps human-centered leaders find clarity in uncertainty, drive innovation, and achieve breakthrough results.  She’s the founder and CEO of Let’s Grow Leaders, an international leadership development and training firm known for practical tools and leadership development programs that stick. She’s the award-winning author of four books including Courageous Cultures: How to Build Teams of Micro-Innovators, Problem Solvers, and Customer Advocates and Winning Well: A Manager’s Guide to Getting Results-Without Losing Your Soul and a hosts the popular Asking For a Friend Vlog on LinkedIn. A former Verizon Wireless executive, Karin was named to Inc. Magazine’s list of great leadership speakers. Karin and her husband and business partner, David Dye, are committed to their philanthropic initiative, Winning Wells – building clean water wells for the people of Cambodia.

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BUILD CONFIDENCE, TRUST AND CONNECTION WITH CONSISTENT ACTS OF MANAGERIAL COURAGE

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Be More Daring

BUILD CONFIDENCE, TRUST AND CONNECTION WITH CONSISTENT ACTS OF MANAGERIAL COURAGE

Get the FREE Courageous Cultures E-Book to learn how

7 Practical Ways to be a Bit More Daring

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