Beyond Either/Or: How Human-Centered Leaders Land in the AND
Confidence or humility? Results or relationships? You don’t have to choose. How to be a human-centered leader and land in the AND.
One of the most common questions we hear from leaders is this:
“Should I focus more on results or on people?”
“Should I show more confidence or stay humble?”
And the answer is always: Yes.
Because the most effective leaders don’t choose between these values—they embrace the tension and land in the AND.
They…
Lead with confidence and humility.
Focus on results and relationships.
Are strong and kind. Driven and collaborative. Clear and curious.
This isn’t about doing everything perfectly or becoming a unicorn who always knows exactly what to say. It’s about holding space for what may feel like opposites—and knowing that the best leadership lives in that intersection.
We call this mindset Landing in the AND—and it’s one of the most powerful shifts a leader can make.
Confidence AND Humility: Leadership’s Best Power Duo
Confidence is magnetic. It helps others feel safe in your leadership. It allows you to speak with clarity, act with purpose, and inspire follow-through when things get tough. When you’re confident, people can feel your belief—not just in yourself, but in the team, in the mission, and in what’s possible.
But confidence alone isn’t the full story.
Pair it with humility, and now you’re leading with your whole self. You’re grounded, open to feedback, and fully aware that leadership is a shared experience—not a solo performance.
Humility helps you pause before reacting. It helps you say, “I don’t know the answer to that—but I’ll find out.” It makes it easier for others to speak up, challenge your thinking, and bring their best ideas forward.
Together, confidence and humility create a leadership presence that is both reassuring and relatable. One without the other can easily tip too far—into arrogance or self-doubt. The strength lies in the balance.
Landing in the AND means you can say:
“I believe in this direction, and I want to hear what I might be missing.”
“I’ve got experience here, and I’m always learning.”
Results AND Relationships: The Foundation for Sustainable Success
If you’re only focused on metrics, deadlines, and deliverables, you might get short-term wins. But without care and connection, those wins often come at the cost of trust, morale, and long-term performance.
On the flip side, when leaders prioritize relationships but avoid accountability, teams can become unclear, unproductive, or unmotivated.
The truth is, your people and your results need each other. Great performance doesn’t come from pressure alone—it grows in environments where people feel supported, challenged, and seen.
Leaders who Land in the AND recognize that productivity and empathy are not in conflict. They work together.
They clarify expectations and ask how people are doing.
>They address performance gaps and coach with compassion.
>They celebrate wins and reflect on how the journey felt along the way.
This sounds like:
“Let’s talk about what success looks like, and how we can get there together.”
“I care about your growth, and I’m committed to helping you succeed.”
How to Start Leading from the AND
Landing in the AND doesn’t require a total leadership overhaul. Small shifts make a big difference. Here are a few places to start:
1. Know your strengths—and keep building
Confidence comes from clarity. Take time to reflect on your leadership superpowers. What do people count on you for? What do you do well that’s uniquely yours? Then ask yourself: how am I using those strengths to lift others up?
2. Invite challenge
Humility means welcoming other perspectives. Ask your team, “What am I missing?” or “What would make this better?” When you model openness, you give permission for the best ideas to surface—even if they challenge your own.
3. Prioritize people and performance
When you’re prepping for a meeting or project, ask two quick questions:
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“What result are we driving toward?”
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“How are people experiencing the work right now?”
Both matter. Both influence outcomes. You’re leading the whole system, not just the spreadsheet.
4. Use AND language
Your words reinforce your mindset. Practice saying things like:
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“We’re moving fast and making time to connect.”
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“This is a high priority and I want to hear your input.”
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“We’re celebrating what’s working and looking at where we can grow.”
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What Happens When You Lead from the AND
When you consistently lead from the AND, your team starts to mirror it.
They become more confident and more collaborative.
>They focus on high standards and care for one another.
>They feel safe to take risks and own results.
And you? You start to experience more energy, less rework, deeper trust, and more sustained success—because you’re no longer carrying the tension of either/or. You’re modeling what it looks like to thrive in complexity. To lead with clarity and heart. To show up with your full self, and make space for others to do the same.
The best leaders land in the AND.
That’s where resilience grows, trust deepens, and real influence begins.
Your turn. What is your best human-centered leadership best practice to land in the AND?
See Also: Get Your Team Back on Track Fast (Asking For a Friend)
Can We Teach Leaders Humility? (Spoiler: You can and here’s how)
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