High-performing teams prioritize being helpful
Prioritizing peers is the habit that took me (Karin) longer to learn than any of the other habits we teach.
In fact, when people ask about my career regrets, not recognizing the importance of deep trust with co-workers, sooner, always tops the list.
Why so hard?
I wanted to win.
And in the stack-ranked world I was living in as a Verizon executive, winning meant performing better than the other _____ insert other team I was asked to “crush” here (e.g., co-workers, regions, channels).
The messaging was clear. Success meant being at the top of the stack rank, an engaged and motivated team, and a happy boss. Bonus points for winning a fancy award and the vacation that went with it.
Peers were not the priority. Who had time for that?
Until I met Dan.
Dan
It was my first day in my contact director role supporting our enterprise (read: big, important business customers), and we had a huge outage —an entire bank’s ATM network was down.
Dan, knowing I didn’t have a clue what to do, called and said, “Just keep me on the phone with you until this is fixed. I’ll lead you through every step of the way.”
I said, “You don’t have time for that!”
Dan said, “You need help. I’ve got you.”
I’m sure Dan had a long list of to-dos that day that would have helped his team, his customers, and his progress on the stack rank. But he dropped everything and prioritized my problem as if it were his own.
Dan understood the competition isn’t in the stack rank.
The competition is a bad customer experience.
That kindness and maturity changed my perspective entirely. I realized that supporting my boss and my team was a good start, but not enough for a successful and fulfilling career.
As it turns out, Dan helped EVERYONE and EVERYONE helped Dan (and whoever Dan needed them to help). Dan was winning– and not just on the scorecard.
Today, my competitors are not other CEOs running training companies; they are my peers– and I’m happy to say we work to help one another in big and little ways every day– and our clients, teams, and organizations are stronger as a result.
What It Means to Practice the Prioritize Peers Habit (Click on the Image For Quick Video Tips)
This video provides practical reasons that prioritizing peers is so important, and gives you a team experiment to strengthen the priortize peers habit on your team.
When you practice Prioritize Peers, you look beyond your lane.
You stay aware of what others are carrying. And you ask—not “Is this my job?” but “Is this where I can add value?”
- You show up—especially when it’s inconvenient.
- You don’t wait until someone’s overwhelmed to offer help.
- You check in before they drop the ball.
Why Prioritize Peers Builds Trust, Speed, and Resilience
When you consistently support your peers, it transforms the way work gets done.
Practicing Prioritize Peers helps you:
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Build deep, earned trust—not just surface-level friendliness
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Prevent small issues from turning into burnout or bottlenecks
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Create team loyalty that survives pressure
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Improve visibility across silos and functions
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Model collaboration that raises the bar for everyone
The teams that win the most?
Are usually the ones where people want each other to win.
How to Make Prioritizing Peers a Habit
It starts with paying attention—and offering support.
1. Use this powerful phrase.
“How can I be most helpful?”
Simple. Direct. Respectful of their context. It opens the door without overstepping.
2. Ask before they’re in crisis.
Check in proactively. Helping early is more powerful (and less stressful) than saving the day late.
3. Go beyond the obvious.
Sometimes the most helpful thing isn’t doing the work—it’s giving feedback, clearing the path, or offering visibility.
4. Say it out loud when someone helped you.
“Thanks—what you did really helped me deliver on time.” That kind of recognition encourages more peer support.
5. Reciprocate—but not transactionally.
Make generosity the default—not the reward.
Phrases That Reinforce the Prioritize Peers Habit
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“I see you’re juggling a lot—want to talk through anything?”
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“Would it help if I reviewed this with fresh eyes?”
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“If I can take something off your plate, let me know.”
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“What’s the best way for me to support you this week?”
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“I’ve got capacity—anything I can jump in on?”
Three Mini-Personal Experiments
Here are some experiments to try to strengthen the “prioritize peers” habit.
1. Weekly Win Boost
Each week, identify a peer’s accomplishment and publicly celebrate it (e.g. chat shoutout, email kudos, meeting mention). Explain how their success supports the team’s mission.
2. Tuesday “Who Needs Help?” Check-In
Every Tuesday, reach out to one peer and ask: “Is there anything I can take off your plate this week?” Keep offers small, specific, and sustainable.
3. Peer Playback Loop
For 4 weeks, after collaborating with a peer, follow up with: “What worked well in how we partnered? Anything I could do differently next time?” This strengthens mutual accountability and continuous improvement.
See Also: How to Build a Network of Peer Relationships
Prioritize peers is one of the connection habits in our SynergyStack® Team Development System, and easy to use teambuilding tool to accelerate performance, reduce stress and work better together.
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