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The Most Important Question to Ask About a Leader

by | Mar 11, 2019 | By Karin Hurt, Courageous Cultures |

“If I’m ever in doubt about whether a leader is making a positive impact on my organization, I ask myself this most important question, Would I want my child working for this person?
If the answer is no, I know I need to make the tough call.”
– David Alexander, President at Adecco Group

Talent is tricky. Despite your best intentions, competency models, nine-box grids, and calibrated performance sessions, sometimes the wrong guy ends up in the wrong seat for the wrong reason — and wreaks havoc on your organization.

The more vetted the choice, the trickier it is to question the impact. Add a spike in KPIs, and it’s even more tempting to look the other way.

And yet, when you’ve got a leader in the wrong job, the downstream impact is pricy.

Everyone’s watching. “So they value churn and burn behaviors here. I see how it is…”

The jerks feel validated and step up their game, and your high EQ talent entertains the next call they get from a recruiter.

The Most Important Question to Ask Yourself When You’re On the Fence About Promoting a Leader

I met David Alexander at an Adecco leadership development off-site where we were speaking.

After a few fantastic conversations, I chose a later flight home so I could stick around to hear from the wisdom of the president’s panel discussion. After all, they are recognized as a great place to work – they’re doing something right.

One question for the panel was “What do you look for in a senior leader?”

Bam. That was the obvious question for this group of high-potential talent aspiring to be the next seat on the panel.

I haven’t stopped thinking about what David said next.

“I ask myself: would I want my child working for this person?”

It really comes down to that, doesn’t it?

We know immediately what we want for our children as they enter the workforce. And it’s not just what’s easy or fun. If we’re real, we know it was the really tough stuff that helped us grow. AND, we also hope they’ll find some people to help them navigate the chaos.

Why would we want anything but the best developmental experience for other people’s children?

Which got me thinking of the next series of questions about what I hope for my two sons.

Dear leader to whom I’m entrusting my kids (and yours)

Please…

Share a compelling vision.

Challenge them.

Hold them (and others) accountable.

Model collaboration.

Do what you say.

Give them tough feedback.

Give them something important to do.

Speak frankly.

Explain why.

Tell them the truth.

Help them understand what they don’t know.

Ask them great questions that make them think.

Encourage them.

Ensure they understand the bigger picture.

Let them fail and help him pick up the pieces.

Nurture their patience to dig deeper for better answers.

Get to know them.

Let them do something you think they might be able to do, even if they’re not quite ready.

Care about what matters more to them more than this job and find small ways to help.

How about you? What are your best hopes for leaders as they look to grow our next generation of leaders? What matters most?

Update: Well this is fun. Thank you Perugini for sharing this concept with your community on your Italian blog, Lettera aperta a un nuovo Leader (for readers who don’t speak Italian, I found Google Translate to do a lovely job 😉

Want more human-centered leaders in the workplace? Share this today!

Want more human-centered leaders in the workplace? Share this today?

8 Comments
  1. Jamie Marsden

    Amazing Karin, that’s one of the best articles on leadership that I have ever read. What an incredibly powerful question to ask yourself. And I love your list of great leadership behaviours, especially ‘model collaboration’. ???? I think one of the most impactful forms of leadership is leading by example. I’ll definitely spend more time reflecting on the example that I am setting through my behaviours from now on…

    Reply
    • Karin Hurt

      Jamie, You are so kind. Thank you! I really was struck by his question. It’s such an interesting filter. I think about some of the managers who I’ve seen stay in positions because they get “results” but at an incredible cost to the humans on the team and the overall culture of the company.

      If more senior leaders were to ask this question, I imagine we would have far less of that.

      You are doing such important work, and it’s exciting to follow your journey.

      Reply
  2. Wade Stanford

    Love this Karin!! As we hire teachers in our school district, we will adapt this question to: “Would I want this person to teach my child?” This question will help us drill down to a personal level as we seek to find the best fit in every position in the district. Thanks for sharing, you just helped us improve!

    Reply
    • Karin Hurt

      Wade, Thanks so much! Love the adaptation!

      Reply
  3. Ken Downer

    Karin – Great question, great list – the leader’s role in growing relationships and developing people is so often overlooked in the rush to get stuff done.

    Thanks for bringing this out in such a compelling way.

    Reply
    • Karin Hurt

      Thanks, Ken. Totally agree. And for long-term impact, growing relationships and developing people is so vital. Thanks for expanding the conversation!

      Reply
  4. ugo

    Thanks for the great article,
    I allowed myself to reproduce it (with some small adaptations) on my blog in Italian. I thank you for the idea that it almost becomes a reminder for those who want to hire a right person who becomes a future leader, useful to the company and to its entire organization.
    Ugo

    Reply
    • Karin Hurt

      Thanks so much, Ugo. I’m glad you found it useful, and it would be great to see how people engage with this idea in Italy. I do hope that as you share you include a link back to the original article. I looked at your blog. Very impressive. Thanks for all you do to grow leaders!

      Reply

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Karin Hurt

Karin Hurt helps human-centered leaders find clarity in uncertainty, drive innovation, and achieve breakthrough results.  She’s the founder and CEO of Let’s Grow Leaders, an international leadership development and training firm known for practical tools and leadership development programs that stick. She’s the award-winning author of four books including Courageous Cultures: How to Build Teams of Micro-Innovators, Problem Solvers, and Customer Advocates and Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Workplace Conflict, and hosts the popular Asking For a Friend Vlog on LinkedIn. A former Verizon Wireless executive, Karin was named to Inc. Magazine’s list of great leadership speakers. Karin and her husband and business partner, David Dye, are committed to their philanthropic initiative, Winning Wells – building clean water wells for the people of Cambodia.

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