Great ideas come in halves, these are the words I hear often from my LGL en Español partner, Kay Valenzuela. I believe it. Work is enhanced by true collaboration. One of the best parts of my entrepreneurial journey has been the amazing collaborations, in writing, in business, in shared passions. I’ve got four deep collaborations in process now, including writing a children’s picture book with Alli
He was the poster-child for passive aggressive (at least that’s my side of the story). In an effort to keep the peace, I’d tried to shake it off. I’d kept my mouth shut, and encouraged my team to take the “high road”. But the high road was getting bumpier with time. With all this #meanit talk, I realized I needed to take a bit of my own advice; but frankly, I was worried about the
“Pete” a leader in a new job with a substantial increase in scope and scale, asked me this seemingly simple question: “How do you know when to stand your ground?” I knew he needed more than my first instinct of “just go with your gut”.
“I’ll stand my ground. And I won’t back down.”~ Tom
You’ve had those moments. So have I. You desperately want a leadership do-over, but it’s too late. It’s out there – your dark side in all it’s glory.
“Powerful you have become. The dark side I sense in you.”~ Yoda
You hear yourself apologizing: “I just wasn’t myself.”
Two-faced leaders destroy culture, break trust, and diminish results. They act one way when you’re around, and another when you’re not. Frustrating when it’s a peer. Terrifying when you discover that Ms. Two-Faced is a leader in your organization. In front of you she says and does all the right things. At other times, her witchy side emerges. You’ve been naively supporting the two-faced
Don’t destroy fantastic results with lazy relationships. Strong performers grow backwards when trust breaks down. Small issues mushroom overnight. Peers stop helping. Communication collapses. Careers derail. Without support, working harder can backfire. Unchecked frustration fertilizes conflict. Invest in your peers like you invest in your team.
5 Peer Problems
Lack of Investment The Problem:
Are you good at angry? Or, do you waste your “mads?” Angry informs. Angry teaches. Mad makes us care. Unless it doesn’t. Use anger to fuel passions and accomplish change. Don’t respond with frustration, outbursts, or retaliation. All you’ll have then is embarrassment, regrets and apologies. When you are really ticked off, don’t just get mad get thinking.
4 Ways to Use Your
We all know deep in our hearts that teams need conflict. Conflict is “healthy.” Leaders and teams have been talking about Tuckman’s forming, storming, norming, performing model since the mid 1960s. Teams were storming long before that. We get it intellectually. We’ve even seen the value of addressing conflict play out practically. But conflict is uncomfortable. Sometimes addressing conflict