Not Every Meeting Deserves Your Time (Or Oars)
The key to smarter meetings is knowing which ones to avoid.
Imagine this.
You get a calendar invite:
“Boat ride. Monday. 2–5 p.m.”
No explanation or agenda. No clue who else is coming. And, even worse, no idea what you’re doing on the boat.
Just… boat.
You start asking around. Other people are going. Some seem excited. Others are just shrugging and adding it to their calendar as if it’s normal. And you think:
“Well… if everyone else is going, maybe I should too?”
Now replace “boat” with “meeting.”
The Meeting Metaphor That Won’t Let Me Go
Learn more in this week’s “Asking for a Friend” Video from San Diego, CA.
More in this week’s Asking for a Friend Video
I recently shared this “mystery boat ride” scenario with a leadership team I’m working with, and the light bulbs went off. That’s how so many of us treat our meetings. We hop on out of obligation, fear of missing out, or pure habit—without stopping to ask:
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Where is this going?
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Do I need to be on board?
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Could I send a message in a bottle instead?
We’ve been working together to ruthlessly prioritize their calendars—looking at which meetings are driving real results, which could be emails, and which need to quietly sail off into the sunset.
And let me tell you—it’s changing the game.
Don’t Get on the Wrong Boat
Before you accept that next invite (or automatically show up to your 10th recurring Zoom of the week), pause and ask yourself a few important questions:
1. What’s happening at this meeting?
Is there a clear purpose? A tight agenda? And—this one’s big—does the agenda actually relate to your most important work or the strategic goals of your team?
If not, you might just be floating along.
2. Who else is getting on the boat?
Are the decision-makers there? The stakeholders? Or are the people with all the answers… on another boat entirely?
Being in the wrong meeting without the right people is like bringing your oars to a paddleboard party. Awkward. Inefficient. Wet.
3. Why you?
Why are you being invited? What specific value do you bring—and what do you need from this session that you can’t get another way?
If the answer is “just in case,” that’s not a strong enough reason to attend.
If It’s Not Your Boat, Chart a New Course
When you realize the meeting isn’t a good use of your time—don’t just bail. Be strategic:
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Could you contribute via email ahead of time?
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Could someone else attend and share back key insights?
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Could the meeting not happen at all (gasp)?
Declining a meeting doesn’t mean you’re disengaged—it means you’re discerning. We need more discernment and less calendar chaos in today’s world of overwhelm.
Your Mini-Personal Experiment
See more on mini-personal experiments.
Look at your calendar for the week ahead. What boats are you stepping onto without thinking? Where are you showing up more out of momentum than meaning?
Pick one meeting to gracefully bow out of. (Bonus points if you help improve it or replace it with something more efficient.)
Let’s stop glorifying busy and start choosing wisely.
Because you weren’t meant to drift through your work week. Y
I’d love to hear from you.
What are your go-to strategies for dodging unproductive meetings? Drop a comment or send me a message. Let’s swap boat stories.
For more time-saving tips see Email Like a Leader: How to Write an Executive Summary That Makes You Easy to Work With
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