How to Network at a Conference (Even If You Hate Small Talk)

What to Say When You Don’t Know What to Say

So… you’re faced with the task of networking at a professional conference.

Which means you’re probably wondering how to glide into a room of strangers and start meaningful conversations without breaking into a flop sweat or pretending to be very, very interested in the buffet table.

Same.

I’m out here living my dream (seriously- I can’t believe I get to grow human centered-leaders for my day job). Which ALSO includes zigzagging across time zones, dodging travel delays like it’s an Olympic sport, and walking into ballrooms full of fabulous, fascinating people… most of whom I do not know.

I find this part hard.

I’m way more comfortable on stage with a mic and a mission than starting conversations from scratch.

But here’s the thing—I’ve learned a few techniques that work (and don’t require pretending you’re someone you’re not). So if this whole networking thing feels a bit awkward, pull up a hotel lobby chair, friend. Let’s talk.

How to Get Better at Meaningful Conversations at a Networking Event (With Video)

1. Stop trying to “network.” Start sharing ideas.

Instead of fixating on what you’re supposed to say about yourself, flip the script. Make the conversation about ideas. Ask about what they’re working on, what they’re fired up about, or what challenge they’re wrestling with. People love to talk about their passions—and you’ll shine more when you’re talking about what matters to you too.

2. Come with curiosity. Leave with connections.

Approach others like you’re there to learn, not pitch or perform. Show up interested and interesting. Lead with questions, not a monologue about your resume.

Start the convo with this gem:

 “What’s something exciting you’re working on right now?”

GOATs (Greatest of All Time) Powerful Phrases of Conference Conversation

Here are a few Powerful Phrases to keep things flowing, adapted from our latest book.

• Connection:
  “Tell me more…” (Honestly, these three words are magic. Try them.)

• Clarity:
  “What would a successful outcome do for you?”
  (This shows a deep interest in the idea they are sharing and what what motivates them.)

• Curiosity:
  “How does this look from your perspective?”
  (This question invites them to share their unique take on what they’re working on and why it matters)

• Commitment:
  “How can I be most helpful to you?”
  (Bonus: they’ll usually ask the same back.)

Be ready to answer these questions yourself

Networking isn’t a one-way street. As much as you ask great questions, people will toss them back your way. So think ahead: What’s your exciting project? What do you care about? How can you be helpful?

If you’re not sure, that’s okay too. A little reflection goes a long way.

Your cheat code for confident networking

• Lead with curiosity, not credentials.

• Talk about ideas, not agendas

• Keep a few powerful phrases in your back pocket.

• And remember: most people feel just as awkward as you.

So that’s one way I make conference networking easier… Now it’s your turn…

What would YOU add to the mix?

Note: If you’re looking to make networking easier for your next conference or company offsite, I’d love to share ideas about how I can bring unique and meaningful interaction as your keynote speaker.