The Danger Of Knowing Exactly What You Want

Kerri knows exactly what she wants in her “some day” husband. He’s her intellectual peer, has common interests, and is hot – like her. She’s got big plans for her large hypothetical family.

She’s convinced Mr. Right is right around the corner. She only looks up when he matches the picture on her vision board. She doesn’t date much.

“We all have possibilities we don’t know about. We can do things we don’t even dream we can do.”
~ Dale Carnegie

It happens in careers too. Have a vision, mind-map your life, set goals, make plans, get up earlyhustle. Without direction, you’ll under-achieve. With over-direction you’ll destroy your potential.

The Danger of Knowing Exactly What You Want

Beware of the downsides of your know-it-all pursuit. Laser-like focus burns past peripheral opportunities. Strategically built networks exclude the “weirdos” you need.

“Tenacity is using new data to make new decisions to find new pathways to find new ways to achieve a goal when the old ways didn’t work.”
~ Seth Godin

Dogged pursuit of exactly what you want scares those who’ve got relevant guidance. Pushing too hard, pushes away possibilities:

  • In pursuit of promotion, you miss your calling
  • You make the deadline, but miss the mistake
  • You hustle past the guy you need to know
  • You love your suppliers, so stop hearing pitches
  • You’re too busy to take on the special project

Hustle With Possibility

Think big, set goals, make plans and then…

  • Pause for rest and reflection
  • Hang out with unusual suspects
  • Read on unrelated topics
  • Volunteer
  • Make lateral moves
  • Notice what brings you joy
  • Listen to your team

Create a Life Map: How to Make 2013 A Great Year

A Guest Post by Steve Van Remortel, Author of Stop Selling Vanilla Icecream 

How to Make 2013 A Great Year: Start Today!

As we approach 2013 I challenge you to make it a great year. I want to give you one simple tool to help you become better in all the areas of your life: as a spouse, businessperson, leader, employee, father, mother, son, daughter, and friend.

That simple tool is a “Life Map.” It’s a one page personal plan that helps you achieve success in all aspects of your life. I am consistently working with clients and friends with their life map and I strongly recommend you start creating yours today.

Creating Your Life Map

The life map contains three columns, working from right to left, beginning with your legacy.

Define Your Legacy

Starting with the right column you begin your life map by defining your legacy. How do you want to be remembered when you leave this life?

Long-Term Objectives

Next, in the center column of your life map you write down your long-term objectives that will achieve your legacy.

Annual Objectives

Then in the far left column of your life map you write down your annual objectives for the next 12 months that will help you accomplish your long-term objectives. Simple, but very effective!

The Process

It is best to complete your life map by going away each year for a couple of days to a quiet place where you can think and sort out your future. Then, each month, you review your annual objectives and develop action plans for the coming month to achieve them.

I developed my first life map about six years ago. It has changed my life forever.

In my legacy, I want my kids to view their dad as a mentor and adult friend they can talk to about anything. That starts by spending individual time with them now. So my annual objectives include going with them to concerts, events and just being together.

One of my business objectives is to be a respected author and speaker. That plan became reality with my first book called Stop Selling Vanilla Ice Cream was published October 16 ,2012.

As with any plan, discipline and accountability are necessary. If you need to find someone to hold you accountable to your life map, share it with a close friend or mentor.

It’s a new year. How do you want to be remembered? What will you do in 2013 to build that legacy? You can do it. You just have to get started today.

Go to Stop Selling Vanilla Icecream to download the free Life Map template and create your personal plan to make 2013 a great year for you.

Remember, Those Who Plan – PROFIT!

Steve Van Remortel is a consultant, speaker, certified behavioral analyst and president of SM Advisors Inc., a strategic planning and talent management consulting firm. Contact him at by email, or on his website or go to or