resistance

5 Reasons You're Avoiding Your "I Don't Wanna" List (and what to do about it)

David Dye and I do truly strive to lead by example. So I wasn’t shocked the other day when my Winning Well co-author leveraged a practice straight out of chapter 20, thanking me for something I’d done to promote our Winning Well mission.

And then, hearkening back to chapter 7 (accountability), I laughed and said, “If I were really a good co-author I would have done ________ .” (it really doesn’t matter what this is, as I will here pull a Scarlett Ohara, and be sure to worry about that tomorrow).

David didn’t miss a beat, and said, “Oh I get it. It’s on your ‘I don’t wanna list.'”

Deep pause. It was. The next vital question was, ‘Why? Why was it there? What was the resistance? Why did I agree to do something I was avoiding?

5 Reasons You’re Avoiding Your “I Don’t Wanna” List (and what to do about it).

“The more important a call to action is to our soul’s evolution, the more Resistance we will feel about answering it. But to yield to Resistance deforms our spirit. It stunts us and makes us less than we are and were born to be.” – Steven Pressfield

In my experience there are five big  reasons something ends up on our “I Don’t Wanna List.” I’d love to hear what you would add.

  1. It’s a Damn Stupid Idea:  You hate the idea and everything around it. You’re against it at a core values level. The only thing dumber than putting this on your permanent avoid list, would be to actually cave.
    Next Step: Time to person-up. Use your words. Share your feelings. Before you do anything stupid, say what you mean– chances are any stupid idea attracts a swarm of naysayers just ready to buzz. Speak up. Others will follow.
  2. Your Values Say NO!!!! It’s a good idea in theory, but something about your values say “no.”
    Next Step: Listen to your heart… with an open mind. If it’s a real values clash– say so, and then be open to further explaining your rationale or removing yourself from the scene.
  3. You’re Annoyed: But it’s got to be done. We all have tasks that drive us crazy, but sometimes you’ve just got to do them.
    Next Step: Resist the urge to save them all for later. Knock out a few such tasks early in the day while you’re fresh.
  4. You’re Scared: Perhaps you’re afraid of screwing it up. Or maybe you’re worried about what others will think.
    Next Step: Consider what’s the worst thing that could happen. Chances are it’s not as bad as you think.
  5. You’re Stuck: You really don’t know what to do next
    Next Step: Ask yourself the Winning Well secret bonus question, “What would you do if you did know?” Let go of the pressure and brainstorm possible solutions with confidence.

We all have tasks we would rather avoid…. but when you can develop the discipline to know what must be done, and make it happen, you boost your energy and confidence for your Winning Well mission.

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