Speakers pause for effect. Great leaders pause for effectiveness.
A powerful pause is a wildly under utilized leadership tool. Awkward silence creates opportunity. I’ve never regretted a pause. I’ve got buckets-full of “I wish I had paused” moments. When in doubt, pause more.
9 Powerful Pauses
A pause gives you both time to think. Pauses calm emotions. Pregnant pauses give birth to vibrant ideas. 7 situations where pausing is most powerful. Let’s pass the pause… what would you add?
You’ve been given a tremendous compliment
Pause and take it in. Look them back in the eye, with a sincere thank you. Pause amplifies appreciation.
2. Sad news
Sad or disappointing news is often shocking. It’s difficult to know what to say. Give your heart time to adjust. Connect–then speak.
3. Anger (yours)
Sometimes a grown-up “time-out” is the best remedy. Step back. Think more. If you really want to say “it,” there will be time. You will likely find better words after a breather.
4. Anger (theirs)
They’re spitting teeth. Accusations. Exaggerated facts. Misrepresented viewpoints. You’re tempted to respond immediately. You must clear it up. They interrupt… you talk faster, or louder. They’ll hear you more clearly after a good pause. If you stop talking so will they. They may even breathe in the process.
5. Ideas (yours)
If your idea’s that great, it will still be there after others have had a chance to talk. In fact, it will be even better if you use it to build on what others have to say. Let others talk first, then share.
6. Ideas (theirs)
Pause. Let them keep going. Let them build on their thinking. Nod, smile, encourage. Try not saying a word, until they get it all out.
7. No ideas
It’s amazing how often people will talk until they have something to say. If you don’t know, go slow. Quiet creates contribution.
Now it’s even more tempting to fill the space. No one else is talking, and you’re the leader. Best for you to set the stage? Maybe. Or what if you said, “Yikes, this one’s tough… let’s all take a minute to consider the options.”
Most of the time when the phone rings or the text beeps in, we answer right away. Sometimes necessary. Sometimes not. Consider a pause to stay in the moment. Then call back with complete attention.
When do you find it valuable to pause?
Help for Blabbermouths (Dan Rockwell, Leadership Freak)